DRUNK HULK ON THE NINETIES!


 

 DRUNK HULK ON THE NINETIES!

◊ DRUNK HULK GET DOLL! AND YOU SHOW DRUNK HULK WHERE STUPID ANGEL TOUCH YOU!

◊ THERE NOTHING MORE EXTREME THAN BUNCH OF GUY SINGING ABOUT NO SAYING THAT THEY LOVE YOU!

◊ ALICE IN CHAIN SEE DIFFERENT VERSION OF SEVEN! BECAUSE THAT MOST CERTAINLY NO MAN IN BOX!

◊ EXCEPT WHEN SHE SANG WITH CARTOON CAT! PAULA ABDUL HID HER CRAZY PRETTY GOOD!

◊ X-FILES SHOW PEOPLE THAT MULDER WAS NICE GUY BEFORE HE MOVE TO CALIFORNIA AND PRETEND BE WRITER!

◊ YOU CAN NO MAKE PEARL JAM! UNLESS YOU WATER YOU SOUNDGARDEN!

◊ MEATLOAF DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE! BUT NO CHANGE AWFUL NAME!

◊ JILL SOBULE TOTALLY KISS GIRL 13 YEAR BEFORE KATY PERRY DID! AND SHE LIKE IT!

◊ ADAM SANDLER PROVE HE GROW AS ACTOR! HE START AS MAN CHILD BILLY MADISON! AND END AS BIG DADDY!

◊ FIONA APPLE A DAY KEEP SPIN DOCTORS AWAY!

◊ GREATEST TRICK DEVIL EVER PULL WAS CONVINCING WORLD WINONA RYDER COULD ACT!

◊ NO LET SUN GO DOWN ON THEM! DID ELTON JOHN AND GEORGE MICHAEL CONFESS TO BE WEREWOLF?

◊ DESPITE WILSON PHILLIPS PLEAS! FAN COULD NO HOLD ON FOR ONE MORE DAY!

◊ THANK TO BJORK! AMERICA DISCOVER ICELAND! FINALLY! AMERICA LEARN ABOUT NEW COUNTRY WITHOUT BOMB IT FIRST!

◊ HOOTIE PROVE THAT HE IMMUNE TO POISON OF STUPID BLOWFISH!

◊ AFTER SHE COULD NO TURN BACK TIME! CHER ASK PEOPLE TO BELIEVE IN HER CAREER!

◊ FOR GUY WHO SING ABOUT FREEDOM ALL TIME! GEORGE MICHAEL GOT ARREST AWFUL LOT!

◊ COLOR ME BADD ALTRUISTIC! R. KELLY SELFISH! FORMER WANT SEX YOU UP! WHILE LATTER ALL ABOUT SEXING HIM!

◊ TEN YEAR AFTER KIDS IN HALL SING ABOUT DAVE! DESTINY CHILD RESPOND WITH SONG ABOUT BILL!

◊ LOVE WAS BIG DEAL! MARIAH CAREY HAD VISION OF IT! TAYLOR DAYNE SAY IT BRING YOU BACK! ROXETTE SAY IT MUST BEEN IT! NELSON CAN NO LIVE WITHOUT IT! JANET JACKSON TOLD US HOW IT GO! AND THAT IT NEVER DO! MEATLOAF DO ANYTHING FOR IT! UB40 CAN NO HELP FALL FOR IT! MADONNA TRY JUSTIFY IT WITH NO SUCCESS! COLOR ME BADD! BRYAN ADAMS! STING! AND ROD STEWART! ALL FOR IT! CELINE DION TALK ABOUT IT POWER! AND THEN BRYAN ADAMS ACCUSE DRUNK HULK OF NEVER LOVE WOMAN!

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If you enjoy @DRUNKHULK, then perhaps you’ll also enjoy @FAILEDPILOT. Thanks!

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About Christian A. Dumais

Christian A. Dumais is an American writer, humorist and public speaker living in Wrocław, Poland. He has published fiction, journalism, and academic articles in several magazines and journals such as GUD, Shock Totem and Ha!Art. His first collection of short stories, Empty Rooms Lonely Countries, was published in 2009. He also created, edited, and contributed to Cover Stories, a euphictional anthology of 100 stories inspired by songs, which was published in 2010. His most recent book is SMASHED: The Life and Tweets of Drunk Hulk.

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