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DRUNK HULK’S TOP 10 TWEETS OF 2011

Here are the Top 10 most popular tweets by Drunk Hulk in 2011!

DRUNK HULK NEW YEAR RESOLUTION!

DRUNK HULK MAKE NEW YEAR RESOLUTION!

DRUNK HULK MOST SEXIEST PEOPLES OF 2011!

Drunk Hulk chooses the sexiest men and women alive for 2011!

DRUNK HULK MOST SEXIEST PEOPLES OF 2011!

DRUNK HULK DEBATE FAIL!

In less than :53 seconds, Drunk Hulk destroys his chances of becoming the next President of the United States. Sadly.

DRUNK HULK HAD 99!

Drunk Hulk steps in to do a little protesting of his own!

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- West Coast Avengers

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #62

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on February 1, 2012 at 3:01 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 62 (September 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: Roy and Dann Thomas

Penciler: Paul Ryan

Inker: Danny Bulanadi

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

This is it! The conclusion to the storyline that started way back in issue #42. The team finally confronts Immortus to save the Scarlet Witch from intermittent trances.

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

After wasting an issue fighting the Legion of the Unliving, the West Coast Avengers are face-to-face with Immortus at last. Before punches are thrown, Immortus answers some questions with the Power of Exposition. It was Immortus who reverted Vision to an android incapable of loving Wanda. It was Immortus who made Wanda’s twins disappear. All of this was done because Scarlet Witch is a nexus, a rare being who belong equally in all possible timelines. And Immortus needs her so he can protect and control the centuries under his dominion.

Finally, the team has had enough of all the big words Immortus keeps using. So do what they do best and start punching! (more…)

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #61

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on January 25, 2012 at 2:57 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 61 (August 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: Roy and Dann Thomas

Penciler: Paul Ryan

Inker: Danny Bulanadi

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

Immortus transports the West Coast Avengers to Limbo where they face off with the Legion of the Unliving. Meanwhile, Agatha Harkness finds out what Immortus’ plan is all about.

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

While Roy and Dann Thomas get the writing credit, it should be pointed out that there’s a “special thanks” to R.J.M. Lofficier, who was the wife of French science fiction writer, Jean-Marc Lofficier. I don’t know what her contribution to the story was, but I figured since someone at Marvel felt it pertinent to give her thanks on the opening splash page, I should at least mention her here.

And we’re off… (more…)

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #58

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on January 4, 2012 at 2:25 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 58 (May 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: Fabian Nicieza

Penciler: Tom Morgan

Inker: Randy Emberlin

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

The team returns to Los Angeles after suffering the defeat of Magneto, Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver. And before they can figure out what to do next, the city suffers a horrifying earthquake.

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

“The Day the Earth Moved” probably disappointed a lot of readers. Not only does it not continue the big throw down between the West Coast Avengers and Magneto, but it seems that John Byrne has departed the book. Fabian Nicieza has taken over the writing and Tom Morgan returns (issue #38) to do the art with Randy Emberlin.

(more…)

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #57

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on December 28, 2011 at 3:32 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 57 (April 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: John Byrne

Penciler: John Byrne

Inker: Paul Ryan

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

The team suffers a serious defeat against the newly turned Scarlet Witch with her father Magneto and brother Quicksilver. When the bad guys flee to Asteroid M, the team gets the chance to regroup and attack again. But the second time isn’t always the charm…

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

We start right where we left off last issue, with an unconscious Pym at the mercy of the villainous trio. Magneto is the one who keeps showing restraint and not causing bloodshed unless there’s absolutely no choice, which appears to disappoint Wanda. It’s the Human Torch who comes to save the day, but he’s clearly outmatched. Wanda tries to deactivate him with her powers, but Pietro stops her, claiming that he thought Wonder Man was about to break free (we know, of course, that Quicksilver is helping the Avengers and is playing along with his family for his own reasons). Magneto decides that enough is enough and he transports them out of the cottage towards his Asteroid base in space. On the way, they run into Iron Man who is easily taken down by Wanda. Of interest, Magneto tries to save Iron Man, but due to Iron Man’s use of anti-magnetic agents in his armor, he could not stop his free fall. (more…)

Snowman Cookies!

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on December 27, 2011 at 10:52 am

While these cookies didn’t turn out as lovely as the one in the recipe/tutorial, I’m pretty proud of these. If you ever feel the need to anthropomorphize your food, this is a delicious way to go.

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #55

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on December 14, 2011 at 3:32 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 55 (February 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: John Byrne

Penciler: John Byrne

Inker: Paul Ryan

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

The team learns that Loki is behind the recent alliance among their worst villains. When they confront Loki to turn the tide, the trickster refuses to go down without a fight!

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

Now this is certainly more like it. If the beginning of this storyline had half the fun as its ending, this would be a fantastic crossover. That said, Acts of Vengeance just didn’t work. Luckily for us, Byrne steers the ship to a strong finish while setting up the West Coast Avengers’ next big threat. I even like the story’s title “Let There Be an Ending!” which feels like something a disgruntled and tired editor or writer would come up with.

Thor tells everyone that it’s his half-brother, Loki, who is responsible for the recent attacks and destruction. This comes as a surprise to everyone as they thought Doctor Doom was in charge, even though the recently captured Wizard insists he’s the one in charge. Before they can question the Wizard, he escapes from his cell using a miniature teleportation device he had hidden in a false thumbnail (like most of us do!).

The Wizard arrives back at the villains’ secret headquarters where everyone is dealing with the fact that Doctor Doom had never been a part of their alliance, that it had been one of his Doombots all along. When Lackey (Loki in disguise) learns that the Wizard had just teleported there from a cell at the Avengers’ headquarters, he freaks out and reveals his true identity to everyone. All the villains are shocked by the reveal. Kingpin sees this as an opportunity to exit stage right.

Wonder Man returns to the compound to see the Scarlet Witch’s cottage missing. Harkness tells him that the cottage was hurled skyward. U.S. Agent appears to tell them that using the automated tracking system, he’s discovered that the cottage is orbiting Earth (why would you put a tracking system inside a cottage?). Wonder Man wants to jump into action immediately, but it’s U.S. Agent who insists that they take a space-rigged quinjet and “do it by the numbers, with cool heads.” Cool heads or not, as soon as they’re in space, Wonder Man flies to the cottage when it suddenly explodes.

Just as Loki predicted, Thor and the Avengers were able to track the energy signatures from the Wizard’s teleportation device and begin an attack on their secret base. It turns out, however, that they’ve been operating out of the Isle of Silence, where Loki had previously been imprisoned, and where Loki has complete control over its environment. The heroes launch a full attack against Loki, but between the monsters, living plants and strong winds, they’re forced to fight for their lives against their surroundings. So it comes down to a battle between Thor and Loki, which is handled effectively and quickly. Thor uses his hammer to create a pit for Loki to fall in and then he closes the ground above him like a giant door, trapping Loki “under a million tons of Earth” (so the Isle of Silence is on Earth?).

Hank and Janet return to the compound. Janet decides to check in on everybody’s favorite comatose witch, but finds a bruised and battered U.S. Agent instead. He warns her to get away, but it’s too late. The issue ends by revealing the Scarlet Witch, sporting a new outfit and haircut, stating that all of her powers are finally unleashed.

WEST BOAST OR ROAST?

Boast. And we’re back on track. Crossover or not, this is the quality I’ve come to expect with Byrne on the title.

WEST COAST SCENE (OF THE WEEK)!

Falcon says it best…

Previously on West Coast Wednesdays…

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #4

Avengers Vol. 1, #250

Iron Man Annual #7

West Coast Avenger Vol. 2, #1

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #2

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #5

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #6

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #7

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #8

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #9

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #10

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #11

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #12

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #13

Avengers Annual #15

West Coast Avengers Annual #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #14

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #15

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #16

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #17

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #18

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #19

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #20

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #21

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #22

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #23

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #24

West Coast Avengers Annual #2

Avengers Annual #16

Silver Surfer #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #25

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #26

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #27

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #28

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #29

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #30

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #31

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #32

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #33

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #34

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #35

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #36

West Coast Avengers Annual #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #37

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #38

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #39

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #40

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #41

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #42

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #43

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #44

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #45

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #46

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #47

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #48

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #49

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #50

West Coast Avengers Annual #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #51

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #52

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #53

Avengers Vol. 1, #312

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #54

Avengers Vol. 1, #313

Some random jokes…

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on December 11, 2011 at 6:58 pm

If you don’t follow me on Twitter, there’s a good chance you’ve missed these. I’ve challenged myself to write at least 10 jokes a day (outside of the Drunk Hulk jokes) and throw them up on Twitter. There’ll be some misses, I’m sure, but occasionally I’m bound to get one right. Here are some of the jokes I’ve been tweeting for the last few days:

European students always struggle with Ezra Pound’s poetry because they use the metric system.

Too proud to resort to cannibalism, the Kool-Aid Man dies of thirst in the desert.

The only doctor in the restaurant, patrons watch in horror as proctologist performs emergency enema on choking victim.

Man applying for the Director of Holocaust Museum position worries that he smiled too much during the job interview.

Stripper embarrassed by her student past.

IKEA instruction manual humbles MacGuyver.

Hipster Sherlock Holmes solved the case ironically, last week, before it was cool.

Baby aspirin tragically swallowed before it could become adult strength.

Restful coma continuously interrupted by wife’s loud annoying pleas to wake the fuck up.

Overachieving stopped watch right three times in one day.

Dying university student sees family on death futon.

Historians don’t know what to do with Schindler’s recently discovered bucket list.

Strict English professor continues to boycott Apple for failing to capitalize i.

Scientist who cloned himself will unveil experiment once he stops making out with it.

While it happened in Vegas, tourist discovers he can’t get herpes to stay there.

It’s hard being the middle taco. It’s never cherished as much as the first and never appreciated as much as the last.

Real estate market in Kandor goes underwater when Brainiac accidentally drops bottle in the tub.

Occupy Wall Street movement on Gilligan’s Island puts the Howells at a disadvantage.

Envious salt wishes it had its own spray too.

Judge rules that a blogger isn’t a journalist. I didn’t go to 4 years of Blogger School to be mistaken for a reporter.

To reinvigorate their image, IKEA to introduce dead ends, minotaurs in their stores in 2012.

Overweight hunter accidentally shoots Richard Simmons when he jumped out suddenly from behind tree.

Bartleby wakes up refreshed, thinks he might finally get some scrivening done today.

Professional plagiarist feels like he keeps repeating himself.

Man sincerely asks “How are you?” Friend assumes it’s a greeting and throws question back.

World drops bombshell on Mythbusters. They respond with cannonball.

Cain threatens to turn the tables on accusers. Later he’ll put the chairs upside down.

Police officer on vacation at Yellowstone National Park instinctively reaches for pepper spray at sight of campers.

Students meet at Starbucks again to complain about the high price of tuition.

Naive 13 year old thinks he invented masturbation.

Stoner can’t get over how, like, seven seasons of 24 is, like, a whole week.

Hamster’s other car is a giant wheel.

Award winning prolific spam writer in China horrified to discover she was writing about penises all this time.

Newly designed white Coca-Cola can is forced to re-examine own identity, sexuality.

Despite heavy casualties, Doritos aficionados continue quest for mythic Cool Ranch.

West Coast Wednesdays: Avengers Vol. 1, #313

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on December 7, 2011 at 2:54 pm

Avengers, Vol. 1, Issue 313 (January 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: John Byrne

Penciler: Paul Ryan

Inker: Tom Palmer

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

The Avengers are recovering from the destruction of their main headquarters when the Mandarin (now with convenient nipples on his armor!) decides to pay a visit!

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

The three Avengers teams (West, East and Great Lakes) communicate with a one-eyed Jarvis in the ~~Batcave~~ Avengers Park sub-basement. Everyone is a little uneasy by how the public has suddenly turned on them. Hawkeye tells everyone that the Great Lakes Avengers are ready when they’re needed, while the Avengers have to do an inspection of the recently destroyed hydro-base, along with Wonder Man and Vision.

Meanwhile, Mandarin shows up at Avengers Park to continue the damage Freedom Force started last issue. The park is surrounded by protesters who want “NYC for Real People!” Before the police can pepper spray the protesters, Mandarin starts nonchalantly killing officers and soldiers.

Doctor Doom, watching Mandarin on a video screen in a secret lair, is annoyed at Mandarin’s actions. He claims that he has “the fighting sense of a novice in a nunnery.” Harsh words, indeed, Doom. Red Skull enters the room and he starts laying out insults at Doom. This doesn’t please Doom one bit, and they have a throw down, leading Red Skull to shoot Doom. Luckily, Kingpin comes in and starts giving a verbal smack down to both Doom and Skull.

Vision and Wonder Man arrive at the park to take care of Mandarin when the Wizard flies in and gives the two of them a run for their money.

Thousands of miles away, a comatose Scarlet Witch (her new default setting) is being taken care of by Agatha Harkness. She senses that something is wrong and steps outside of their bungalow at the compound. Suddenly, the home begins to shake and is hurled into Earth’s orbit. Once there, Magneto appears. He then wishes his daughter a good afternoon, because, hey, that’s just common courtesy.

Captain America, Black Widow and Hellcat show up to bring Mandarin down. It’s a pretty good fight with lots of punching, scratching, and sexist remarks, until Thor shows up and gets all Hammer Time with Mandarin. The Wizard and Wonder Man continue their fight, which ruins Mandarin’s plans, so he uses the Wizard as a decoy so that he can escape. The Avengers catch the Wizard who basically tells them that he’s fallen into his clever trap.

The issue ends with the bickering villains discovering that Doctor Doom was actually a good old fashion Doombot, meaning he was never a part of their plan to begin with. Twist!

WEST BOAST OR ROAST?

Roast. Not a fan of this one at all. Too much going on and, despite the nature of the crossover, it feels like they’re just throwing villains out to fight the team without any rhyme or reason. And while there’s some progress with the main villains (probably the most interesting part of this whole story), this feels like wheel spinning.

WEST COAST SCENE (OF THE WEEK)!

I see your racism…

And I raise it with sexism!

Previously on West Coast Wednesdays…

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #4

Avengers Vol. 1, #250

Iron Man Annual #7

West Coast Avenger Vol. 2, #1

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #2

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #5

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #6

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #7

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #8

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #9

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #10

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #11

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #12

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #13

Avengers Annual #15

West Coast Avengers Annual #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #14

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #15

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #16

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #17

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #18

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #19

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #20

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #21

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #22

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #23

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #24

West Coast Avengers Annual #2

Avengers Annual #16

Silver Surfer #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #25

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #26

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #27

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #28

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #29

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #30

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #31

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #32

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #33

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #34

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #35

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #36

West Coast Avengers Annual #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #37

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #38

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #39

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #40

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #41

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #42

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #43

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #44

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #45

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #46

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #47

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #48

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #49

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #50

West Coast Avengers Annual #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #51

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #52

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #53

Avengers Vol. 1, #312

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #54

West Coast Wednesdays: West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #54

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on November 30, 2011 at 3:32 pm

West Coast Avengers, Vol. 2, Issue 54 (January 1990)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: John Byrne

Penciler: John Byrne

Inker: Paul Ryan

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

With the team split up in opposite sides of the country, it’s up to Wonder Man, U.S. Agent, Iron Man and Torch to deal with the Mole Man’s attack on Los Angeles.

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

After last month’s awful issue where Byrne had to juggle two major crossovers while still setting up the pieces for his own future stories, it looks like the book is back on track. In fact, it looks like Byrne is having fun again. And if you need evidence of that, you can see it immediately with the playful homage to Fantastic Four #1 on the cover.

The Mole Man attacks Los Angeles with his surplus army of monsters. Wonder Man and Iron Man are the first to respond, with shellhead taking out the first giant monster by lifting it up and dropping it in the Pacific.

Pym and Wasp are returning home on the quinjet after the events in Avengers #312 with a comatose Scarlet Witch. When last we saw Wanda, she was giving Vision one of her creepy uncomfortably long hugs in Avengers Park, and since then she’s fallen unconscious (the third time in a few issues, by the way). Pym and Wasp can’t seem to wake her up. But none of that matters as the quinjet is attacked by one of Mole Man’s three-headed flying monsters. The monster destroys the quinjet easily. Our heroes are about to crash in the mountains, but at the last minute the quinjet stops just inches off the ground. Before Pym and Wasp can figure out how that happened, Pym uses his Pym particles to shrink the monster down to a manageable size. Wasp goes to get help and we can see Magneto hiding in the shadows, thus answering how they managed to survive the crash. It turns out, he was protecting his daughter.

Meanwhile, Torch and Wonder Man confront the Mole Man to find out what’s going on. He claims that the Avengers had attacked him and he is only defending himself. Torch tries to convince the Mole Man that he’s mistaken, that this is all some kind of misunderstanding, but the Mole Man will have none of it. Wonder Man steps up and says he will no longer defend himself. He says that he knows the Mole Man’s staff “is full of all kinds of electronic doohickeys and enough power to fry a small herd of elephants” and that he’s not going to stop him from using it on him.

The Mole Man attacks Wonder Man again and again with his staff (which apparently packs enough power to hurt Simon) and Wonder Man takes the beating, much to the Mole Man’s confusion. Finally, the Mole Man considers reason and decides to withdraw, not pleased that he was duped.

The issue ends with the West Coast Avengers having a video conference with the Avengers, and they determine that something larger is going on, leading Pym to make an unavoidable conclusion (see below).

WEST BOAST OR ROAST?

Boast. And we’re back. This is a fun issue that doesn’t feel like a crossover was pushed into the book. This is more like it!

WEST COAST SCENE (OF THE WEEK)!

What makes this day different than any other?

Previously on West Coast Wednesdays…

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 1, #4

Avengers Vol. 1, #250

Iron Man Annual #7

West Coast Avenger Vol. 2, #1

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #2

The Vision and Scarlet Witch #2

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #5

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #6

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #7

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #8

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #9

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #10

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #11

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #12

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #13

Avengers Annual #15

West Coast Avengers Annual #1

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #14

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #15

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #16

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #17

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #18

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #19

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #20

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #21

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #22

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #23

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #24

West Coast Avengers Annual #2

Avengers Annual #16

Silver Surfer #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #25

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #26

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #27

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #28

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #29

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #30

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #31

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #32

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #33

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #34

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #35

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #36

West Coast Avengers Annual #3

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #37

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #38

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #39

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #40

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #41

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #42

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #43

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #44

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #45

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #46

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #47

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #48

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #49

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #50

West Coast Avengers Annual #4

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #51

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #52

West Coast Avengers Vol. 2, #53

Avengers Vol. 1, #312

West Coast Wednesdays: Avengers Vol. 1, #312

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Posted by Christian A. Dumais on November 23, 2011 at 3:20 pm

Avengers, Vol. 1, Issue 312 (Mid-December 1989)

WEST COAST CREDITS!

Writer: John Byrne

Penciler: Paul Ryan

Inker: Tom Palmer

WEST COAST SUMMARY!

The Avengers’ Hydro-Base has been destroyed, forcing the Avengers to regroup in the sub-basement ~~at their mom’s house~~ in Avengers Park. Before they can assess all the chaos happening across the nation, Freedom Force pays a visit, and unfortunately for our heroes, it isn’t a friendly house call.

WEST COAST THOUGHTS!

I’m jumping over to the regular Avengers title this week to continue our look at Acts of Vengeance which took over the Marvel books during this time. When we last left off, Pym, Wasp, Vision and Scarlet Witch left the West Coast compound to return east to see what was happening with the other team. It’s worth pointing out that this issue is written by Byrne as well.

With regular members of the Avengers occupied with their own problems related to the event, it appears that if the West Coast team hadn’t jumped over, we’d be reading a solo Falcon book. In fact, it’s worth noting that Wasp, Pym, Scarlet Witch and Vision have pretty much taken over the corner shot on the front cover.

Things start off with the team in the sub-basement (the basement under the basement? Because the Avengers just couldn’t just have a basement, they needed something mightier!) where there are lots of TV screens showing off lots of chaos and destruction. Wasp asks, “Has the whole world gone mad?!?” And Pym calmly reminds her that, no, the whole world hasn’t gone mad, just America. Oh! Thanks, Hank!

Scenes like this interest me in comic books as I never quite understand how heroes would get unnerved by this kind of imagery, as it’s something they encounter every single day. These scenes only happen in event books (as they did in the recent Fear Itself) to remind readers that, unlike the time Earth exploded last week, this time It’s Fucking Serious. This is a lot like in Bad Boys 2 when one of the main characters eloquently says “Shit just got real,” implying that all the death and destruction we’ve been watching for the last 90 minutes were insignificant. And as these kinds of Event books grow bigger and bigger, you’d think that it would be easier to convey the doom and gloom of what’s happening, when in actuality it becomes much harder.

Anyway, we cut to all the major villains sitting around the table and planning the Big Plan. We have Kingpin, Mandarin, Magneto, Red Skull, Doctor Doom and lots more. Loki is secretly orchestrating all of this as a man named Lackey (yeah, Loki isn’t good at the whole disguise thing). While the plan to take down all the heroes might be effective, the villains have a difficult time getting along, namely Red Skull, a big time Nazi, and Magneto, a big time Holocaust survivor. Honestly, this is probably the most refreshing part of this entire issue and shows a little consideration in the main story line.

Back in the basement (sorry, sub-basement!), the Super-Power alert goes off! Apparently the Avengers have an alarm that rings whenever someone with super-powers enters Avengers Park. Yeah, I know, that’s pretty dumb. How exactly does that work? And how come the West Coast Avengers never got one? Because that would’ve helped them out every time someone broke into the compound, which is every other day. It’s Freedom Force, which was the 1990′s answer to today’s Thunderbolts. As Pym points out, they’re “composed of known criminals recruited to serve out their time as government agents.” Thank you, exposition. The three members of Freedom Force who arrive are Blob, Pyro and Avalanche.

Freedom Force’s arrival is anything but official, however. In fact, they’re part of the whole don’t-think-about-it-too-much-Acts-of-Vengeance plan to make heroes fight villains they’re unfamiliar with. This is even highlighted when Falcon asks what do they know about Freedom Force, and Pym replies, “Not as much as we should, Falcon.” We are, of course, ignoring the fact that Pym and Wasp fought Freedom Force back in Avengers Annual #15.

And so our big fight begins. For the purposes of dramatic tension, Freedom Force give the team a run for its money. It drags on way longer than it should, and it isn’t until Captain America arrives and announces that Freedom Force is not there on the behalf of the government that it all ends. The issue wraps up with the team standing around in the debris wondering what’s going on with Lackey watching from afar laughing.

WEST BOAST OR ROAST?

Roast. Not feeling it here. While I liked what was going on with the villains, the parts with our trusted heroes felt too much like wheel spinning.

WEST COAST SCENE (OF THE WEEK)!

So to you other villains all across the land, there’s no need to argue: Red Skull just don’t understand!