Today is International Pizza Day!


It's Pizza Day, Bitches!Last month, we celebrated National Pie Day as a way of instilling some traditions in Casa la Dumais.

And while we also observed Grandmother’s Day (Poland), Holocaust Memorial Day and Tu B’Shevat, the next holiday that was honestly worth getting excited over was February 9th’s International Pizza Day (to be fair, Tu B’Shevat is a pretty cool holiday, but not in the middle of winter).

That’s right, today is International Pizza Day. And you thought today was just another Tuesday.

The plan for today is to invent a new pizza. This will either fall into the category of Unbelievably Awesome! or Why, Food Poison, WHY? I have a few different ideas for tonight’s experiment and the more adventurous part of my cold, cold heart is advising me to combine all three said ideas into one delicious Nirvanic pizza.

I’m writing to you today to consider taking the Great Pizza Adventure of 2010 in honor of International Pizza Day and invent something new. Or at the very least, make a pizza for someone you love (even if that means it’s your stomach!).

According to the always dependable Wikipedia:

International Pizza Day is celebrated on February 9 in honor of inventor Johann Strauss Pizza and his cutting edge culinary creation, the Pizza. Following the scientifically proven formula that everything is better with melted cheese on top, Pizza imagined a world where the Mormon-like marriage of flat dough and cheese and tomato sauce and pepperoni and mushrooms existed in harmony with religion and tacos. In 1383, Pizza unveiled his invention to a gathering of 16 scientists. Response to his invention was initially tepid; however, in 1385, Pizza reintroduced his creation with the name iPizza, and the world would never be the same.

The world is said to end in two years. And when the ground is crumbling beneath your feet like a Roland Emmerich-induced fever dream, you’ll be checking off all the regrets in your all too brief life, and not participating in this glorious day will be the biggest regret of them all.

It’s true.

It’s science.

Happy International Pizza Day!

Puff Pizza

Comments


About Christian A. Dumais

Christian A. Dumais is an American writer, humorist and public speaker living in Wrocław, Poland. He has published fiction, journalism, and academic articles in several magazines and journals such as GUD, Shock Totem and Ha!Art. His first collection of short stories, Empty Rooms Lonely Countries, was published in 2009. He also created, edited, and contributed to Cover Stories, a euphictional anthology of 100 stories inspired by songs, which was published in 2010. His most recent book is SMASHED: The Life and Tweets of Drunk Hulk.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *