babyDr. E. Bickerstaff is one of the leading experts on parenting. Not only does he have seven step-children, he also has a PhD in International Studies. Here are a few of his parenting tips, as taken from his Twitter account @parentation:

  • Remember to help save the environment and flush all your dirty diapers down the toilet.
  • When your baby is crying, it’s probably because they’re hungry. Or it could mean they are dying.
  • It’s hard to know why a baby is crying, especially after being changed and fed. 30% of the time it’s because they’re disappointed in you.
  • Don’t pass on your cynical nature to your children. Teach optimism. Sometimes strangers really do have candy in their vans.
  • When to discuss God with your child is an important step in their development. Until then, always refer to God as “Batman.”
  • Remember: Bath time is the most important part of your child’s week.
  • Before adopting a child, practice by adopting a highway first.
  • If the child continues to be confused about the notion of death, consider killing the other puppies too.